I write this out of sheer boredom. I usually find something to do or rather look at once I've depleted my stock of books while travelling by air. This time round I've finished V for Vendetta and am unable to get my head around A Brief History of Time, and I'm terrified my phone will die and with it so will the music. So to entertain myself and you I present to you, "Observations from Seat 20C".
1) Children should be sedated. They are noisy; the parents/grand parents of these kids are noisy too. The last thing i want to hear is the lady across the aisle screaming at the toddler who has slipped from her clutches and is presently staring at some random passenger, who i'm sure has no kind feelings either, especially when the toddler is all red-faced and splotchy. Maybe the lady should have been sedated too.
2) The next time you are in an aisle seat and the food trolley stops right next to you, see if you get claustrophobic.
3) The in-flight magazine is called "Hello 6E". For those missing the word play, 6E would be sexy. Baaaaaarrrrrrffffffff!!!
4) Some of the puns that Indigo comes up with are fun though. My favourite is 'nut case' for the little tin box that the masala nuts come in.
5) People who take a window seat should be tasered if they sleep. What's the point of hogging the window if you're not going to look out of it? In addition, if these people wake up only to go the loo or to get off the place, one should feel free to trip them and hope to hell they fall on their face and pass out on the aisle. This could also ensure that noisy child doesn't get out and that the trolley cannot come by again with its claustrophobic intentions.
6) I'm not much of a talker, especially when it comes to talking to a fellow passenger. But I long for the day when this mysterious, brooding passenger strikes up a conversation and we hit it off. We could stay friends for the rest of our lives and then visit each other with our future families.
7) More claustrophobia! Not just the damned trolley; its accompanied by a whiff of stale deodorant and sweat.
8) In case of turbulence the overhead compartments could open, bags and boxes could fall out and the heads of a good numbers of flyers in the aisle seats could be decapitated. I would be spared of course.
9) How can anyone use the loo? It sees an average of 1 user a minute. That would mean on a 2 hour, 40 minute flight if you happen to be the last one to go, you're likely to be peeing on 159 instances of pee. YEW!
10) And Bangalore is here... Excitement! To see and feel the sun would be brilliant. Especially if the temperature at landing is 21 degrees Celcius. That would be 18 degrees more than what it was when I woke up this morning in Delhi.
That's all folks! I have landed... almost actually. I wait for the thud of the wheels on the ground to make my pen go crooked and then stop the entry. I see the familiar looking plots of land. Not that I know them personally, just that they look Bangalore like. And touchdown in 3, 2, 1... OK then, bye bye.
P.S: It's sad that digital entries cannot convey handwriting. Mine is spectacular, especially after the thud of the wheels.
1) Children should be sedated. They are noisy; the parents/grand parents of these kids are noisy too. The last thing i want to hear is the lady across the aisle screaming at the toddler who has slipped from her clutches and is presently staring at some random passenger, who i'm sure has no kind feelings either, especially when the toddler is all red-faced and splotchy. Maybe the lady should have been sedated too.
2) The next time you are in an aisle seat and the food trolley stops right next to you, see if you get claustrophobic.
3) The in-flight magazine is called "Hello 6E". For those missing the word play, 6E would be sexy. Baaaaaarrrrrrffffffff!!!
4) Some of the puns that Indigo comes up with are fun though. My favourite is 'nut case' for the little tin box that the masala nuts come in.
5) People who take a window seat should be tasered if they sleep. What's the point of hogging the window if you're not going to look out of it? In addition, if these people wake up only to go the loo or to get off the place, one should feel free to trip them and hope to hell they fall on their face and pass out on the aisle. This could also ensure that noisy child doesn't get out and that the trolley cannot come by again with its claustrophobic intentions.
6) I'm not much of a talker, especially when it comes to talking to a fellow passenger. But I long for the day when this mysterious, brooding passenger strikes up a conversation and we hit it off. We could stay friends for the rest of our lives and then visit each other with our future families.
7) More claustrophobia! Not just the damned trolley; its accompanied by a whiff of stale deodorant and sweat.
8) In case of turbulence the overhead compartments could open, bags and boxes could fall out and the heads of a good numbers of flyers in the aisle seats could be decapitated. I would be spared of course.
9) How can anyone use the loo? It sees an average of 1 user a minute. That would mean on a 2 hour, 40 minute flight if you happen to be the last one to go, you're likely to be peeing on 159 instances of pee. YEW!
10) And Bangalore is here... Excitement! To see and feel the sun would be brilliant. Especially if the temperature at landing is 21 degrees Celcius. That would be 18 degrees more than what it was when I woke up this morning in Delhi.
That's all folks! I have landed... almost actually. I wait for the thud of the wheels on the ground to make my pen go crooked and then stop the entry. I see the familiar looking plots of land. Not that I know them personally, just that they look Bangalore like. And touchdown in 3, 2, 1... OK then, bye bye.
P.S: It's sad that digital entries cannot convey handwriting. Mine is spectacular, especially after the thud of the wheels.
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